who would have thought, after trying and perservering for what i think would be best for me and others, it all meant nothing.
In a state of dilema.
I don't know where is this coming from.
I do believe that people learn from their mistakes, and what that doesnt kill, makes one stronger.
But as much as learning from one's mistakes makes me a better person, its burdering me.
And now, before i make up any decision, i will consider, continuously, and indecisively, not that i don't have a mind on my own, but i am just afraid that i will make that very same mistake again.
Or something similar.
I am feeling afraid, and insecured all over.
I always thought that i am always considerate when it comes to maintaining a win-win situation and even, putting others before me.
But it isn't always the case, there are times where i overlooked certain things, or there are things that just wouldn't work on certain people that have worked on some others.
The more i think about it, the more i feel insecured
What if history repeats itself?
Or what if he/she doesnt share the same view as me? yet again.
It's never ending.
The worst pain is to be taken for granted for the things that you have done and always trying to put in 100%, only to realise that you are only getting no where more then 50% back.
To make the pain even more unbearable is to get misunderstood for doing so much.
Its all the little attitude that makes a difference.
My mind wandering into the darkness. yet again.
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